Once Upon A Time
Once upon a time, son
They used to laugh with their hearts
And laugh with their eyes:
But now they only laugh with their teeth
While their ice-block-cold eyes
Search behind my shadow.
There was a time indeed
They used to shake hands with their hearts
But that’s gone, son
Now they shake hands without hearts
While their left hands search
My empty pockets.
“Feel at home!”, “Come again”:
They say, and when I come
Again and feel
At home, once, twice
There will be no thrice -
For then I find doors shut on me.
So I have learnt many things, son
I have learned to wear many faces
Like dresses – home face
Office face, street face, host face
Cocktail face, with all their conforming smiles
Like a fixed portrait smile.
And I have learned too
To laugh with only my teeth
And shake hands without my heart
I have also learned to say “Goodbye”
When I mean “Good-riddance”:
To say “Glad to meet you”
Without being glad; and to say “It’s been
Nice talking to you”, after being bored.
But believe me, son
I want to be what I used to be
When I was like you. I want
To unlearn all these muting things
Most of all, I want to relearn
How to laugh, for my laugh in the mirror
Shows only my teeth like a snake’s bare fangs!
So show me, son
How to laugh; show me how
I used to laugh and smile
Once upon a time when I was like you.
- Gabriel Okara
Explanation
The poet of the poem “Once upon a time” is Gabriel Okara who is a Nigerian. He was born on 24th or
21st of April in the year 1921. In that year Nigeria got independence from Britain so at that time they were still influenced by the British culture.
The background of the poem is that he is
remembering the way people used to behave and interact with each other and he is comparing it with how people interact with others now. How the
people used to do things with their hearts and with pleasure and happiness. It describes what happens when a traditional African culture and
civilization meets with the western culture. The poem is a conversation between a father and his son where the son does things with emotion and the father wants to forget his fake
personality and re-learn and create real personalities from his son. And he is asking the son to show him how to express true love and
show real personality to others. It the first stanza the author mentions that people used to laugh with their heart, they used to laugh with their emotions, when they
would laugh they would do it wholeheartedly and with warmth and they used to laugh with their eyes and show pleasure with them. And
know they do it with only their teeth not with their heart, meaning they do not really want to laugh but do it just to get closer to
you and with their darky gloomy cold eyes they watch you and wait for you from the corner of their eyes waiting for you to leave “search
behind my shadow”. The word “they” seems to refer to the white people who had invaded their country and influenced them with their
culture. In this stanza, the words “ice-block-cold eyes” are used which emphasize the coldness and the inner hatred they have for you,
like they can freeze water with their gaze. These also make the poem feel a bit dark and cold and a slight bit sinister. In the second stanza, he further talks about the personalities of the people of the past he says “they used to shake with their hearts”, here
he is trying to say that when you would meet each other you will shake their hands with pleasure and with warmth and do it willingly. “While
their left hands search my empty pockets” from this we can see that they are trying to use him to get to his money or receive something from
him. This also shows that the people’s personalities are not real and true. In the third stanza, he is talking about when people ask you to come again and say “feel at home” you go there once, twice and the third time
they will not let you in thinking that you are a pest and that they do not want to see you anymore. The words “feel at home” are used for
when you want a guest to feel welcomed and that they belong in that household. Here he mentions that “I find the doors shut on me”, which shows
that they do not even open the door to tell him that he is not wanted at the moment, but instead leaves the door closed keeping him standing outside.
This also shows that when people speak they lie not telling the truth but just saying something nice to grasp their heart. In the fourth stanza he talks about how he has learned to put on faces like how outfits and masks are put on at different times, and with
different people you act differently, for example in the office you act in one way to a person but when you meet them on the street you
act in another way to them, and how all the faces that people have on different occasions. He says “I have learned too” which is suggesting that he has also
changed with the change of the people around him. He also mentions “with all their conforming smiles like a fixed portrait”, suggesting that they all
have the same smile all the time not showing any true emotion. In the fifth stanza he says that he has also been influenced by the people around him and he has learned to keep his true personality a
secret and show the world a fake personality, “to laugh with only me teeth” this part is connected with the part in the first stanza “they
only laugh with their teeth” from this you can see a comparison of what people do and what he does now. This also shows that he has changed
to blend in with the environment. Here is the part where he says “I have also learned to say `Goodbye’ when I mean `Good-riddance’ that is
pointing out to the fact that they will, without thinking and without meaning it say “Goodbye”. He mentions forward “that Glad
to meet you” meaning that he is happy to see you and is happy with your presence “without being glad” meaning that he does not want to
talk to you and they disliked your presence and if they could they would have avoided you and “it’s been nice talking to you, after being bored”
saying that they say things that they do not mean. In the fifth stanza, he concludes it all saying that he does not like what he has become and he wants to be like how he used to be when he was
like a child, so small and innocent. He points out that he really wants to learn how to laugh with emotions like you really mean it and he
compares his laugh like that of a snake’s fangs that shows only the teeth. Snakes are those menacing creatures that are full of venom and can
never be trusted and to compare his laugh with a snake gives the image that the man really does not like his fake personality. This stanza
sums it well by giving the image to the reader that he is not happy and satisfied with himself. The last stanza is the father asking and pleading to his son to show him how to laugh and smile like he did when he was a child.
While their left hands search my empty pockets - Evaluating the narrator’s worth and power or calculating how he could be exploited
Cocktail face - Face showing mixed emotions
Conforming smiles like a fixed portrait smile - Wearing a standard deceitful artificial smile on all occasions
Good-riddance - Expression of relief at being free of an unwanted person
Fangs - Teeth of a venomous snake, used to inject poison
Laugh with their teeth - To fake a laugh, laugh without associated emotions
Ice-block-cold eyes - Eyes lacking a feeling of warmth or endearing expression
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